Boobs and Rash

We have an idea and a plan, executing this plan is difficult. We have figured out a way that we each get 5 straight hours of sleep a night. Will someone tell that to my boobs! They wake me up every three hours and there is nothing I can do to ignore it. It hurts pretty bad. So, our "plan" isn't working too well. Basically I get screwed out of the deal. I guess that is what happens when you are the mom. I wonder if life would be a little easier if we just formula feed. Then I get scared of the pain that involves drying up. Its for the better. Breast milk is best and cheaper, but my God it is a lot of work (and pain)

B has a major rash that started on his arms and now has moved to his chest and legs. Poor guy. He doesn't seem to mind it though. I think it hurts me more than him. We are trying different things to try and clear it up. On top of the rash he has a spot on his butt that is cracked and red. That does hurt him. I hate changing his diaper because I know it hurts him.

We go to the liver doctor on Monday the 2nd and the pediatrician on Tuesday the 3rd. We haven't been out of the house yet, except for a walk around the block. We are trying to get down to my sisters for pictures, but with this major snow storm that came in yesterday, it looks like it will be tomorrow or even Saturday for that matter. ARGHHH I just want to get them done. The pictures might look weird with his rash but at least it's not on his face...yet.

Birth Story

For the last month of my pregnancy I was having contractions (Braxton Hicks) without progress. By my 40 week appointment I was still a tight 3 cm dilated and 80-90% effaced, so I was convinced that I was going to be induced. Sunday Oct. 18th was a beautiful day outside. Nice weather plus football plus a little yard games made for a good day. That night at around 10:30 pm we were watching TV and relaxing in bed. I noticed some cramping that felt like diarrhea cramps (but without the diarrhea). The contractions came and went, but I didn't notice that because the pain of the cramps were constant. By 1:45am I told Mike to call my mom because this just didn't feel right. I went back and forth for 10 min on whether or not to go to the hospital. Finally by 2am I said "lets go!" Contractions were bad and I was panicking. 2:15 am my water broke in the car. I was so worried about ruining the car, but good thing we had plastic and a towel down. By the time we got to the hospital I was in so much pain that I wanted to die. I turned into The Hulk for the epidural and required the nurse and Mike to hold me down so that the doctor could do his thing, the back labor was horrid.

Post epidural was a million times better. I highly recommend them. I progressed quickly and we thought he'd be out by noon. Wrong! I halted at 9 1/2 cm! I was starting to feel pain in my upper abdomen with each contraction which we determined that the epidural did not go that high. I pushed for 4 hours with this pain. Why four hours you ask? Because B wanted to come out sideways. By the time he was getting close to crowning, my epidural was wearing off and my back hurt so bad. With a baby coming out facing the wrong way, you will labor in your back. It felt like my back was going to explode and my kidneys were going to pop out. The anaesthesiologist gave me another dose that was as strong as what they give women who have a c-section. Once I got that I was able to do more productive pushing. Mike was pretty emotion at that point. I think I caught him crying. Once B crowned my contractions stopped, which probably was a good thing because I was able to stretch for a while. A couple more pushes and he was born at 5:53 pm weighing 7 lbs 14 ounces. 17 hours of labor and 4 hours of pushing.

When I looked down and saw him for the first time I couldn't believe what I just did. This human being just came out of me. Then I noticed his head. He had a major cone head coming out the side of his head (since he was sideways). I kept thinking, are you going to put him on my chest, give me my baby already. When he was on my chest I started crying because he was so beautiful. He has my eyes and and full head of hair. I got to finally meet the man kicking me all this time. The boy who made me so sick at first and so uncomfortable at the end. All I could think of was how much it was worth it.

Looking back there is no way in hell I could've done this without the support of Mike. He did so good and stayed so calm throughout the whole thing. Even when I was mean to him, he still was so encouraging and helpful. My nurse, Nancy, was also amazing. She really new what my wishes were (covered and informed) and made sure they happened. My mom was also helpful. She encouraged me and helped me get comfortable as best as she could. All three made sure I didn't give up when I was ready to throw in the towel.

My overall experience wasn't what I expected, but then again I didn't know what to expect. I heard from the staff and my mother that this should've been a c-section and that they can't believe a first time mom was able to push out an almost 8lb sideways baby. I am pretty proud of myself, but there was no way I did this alone!

I have a lot of anxiety about being a mom, thats my nature. B will go to The Childerns Hospital for another check at his liver spot and hopefully all that will be put to rest. Now on to the next chapter of my life and I am so glad I have my own little family now.

Today is my due date.

Well hello there due day, didn't think I would see you come around. BLAH. Went to the doctor yesterday and she decided she could strip my membranes, if I wanted. Of course, anything to help this process along. Needless to say that only hurt a little ;-). So now I am 3 cm and 90 % effaced, -1 station. She still thinks he is 7lbs (although the ultrasound my friend did measured 8lbs, I know it can be off + or - 1 lb, but still yikes!). There is a lot of fluid so if my water breaks spontaneoulsy, bust out the Ark. We have done everything imaginable to try and get him out. Chinese food, eggplant parmiganm, walking, stripping membranes, and of course sex. Apparently he is coming when he wants to and there is nothing we can do about it. Maybe I will just try and stay busy so I don't think about it. I am feeling every emotion possible fraustration, joy, scared, anxious, excited, happy, denial, and so on. I just want to rip the band-aide off already. Mike is just as antsy as the rest of the concerned friends and family that keep calling. I have another appointment on the 20th for an NST and fluid check. She said then we will set up an induction day. They kept telling me that they doubt I will make it to my due date and now they doubt I will make it to my next appointment. Obviously no one knows when he is coming.

My Day Came and Left

A long time ago, when I was about 24 weeks along, I had a premonition. I called October 9th as the official birthday of B. I regret to announce that I was wrong. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised he is late. It is funny because I over analyze every feeling and contraction. I think "is this it", then it goes away. I am trying to decide whether to go back to work tomorrow. I want to so that I can have that time for when he is here, but I don't want to go back because of all the flu patients I see and now with this awsome carpal tunnel syndrome thing going on, I just don't want to! I was hoping I didn't have to make that decision and he would make it for me, but apparently I have stubborn little boy who hates the cold as much as his mom does. I guess I wouldn't come out either. Everyone keeps calling or texting to see if he is here and I hate saying "NO!"

Que Sera, Sera- Whatever will be, will be.

The waiting game sucks!

Went to my doctors appointment today and was hoping for some progress because I had another night of no sleeping due to contractions and back pain. Of course, no progression. I guess that doesn't necessarily mean much, but if I had dilated more that just means that much less to do in the hospital. We are trying everything to speed up the process. I will admit, I have mixed feelings about giving birth. One part of me wants to just enjoy my freedom now, and cherish this moment in time (feeling him move, looking at my belly, and not having to share him). On the other hand, I want to meet him so bad, see him, snuggle him, and have my body back to myself. I'm both excited for this change in my life and nervous at the same time.

I did get a doctors note to stop working if I so choose to do so. I voiced my concern about working with a large population of infected patients with H1N1 flu this close to the end. It scares me to know how high of a risk I am. Plus, now I am worried about visitors to the hospital when I do have my son. I hope people will be very conscience of what they touch and if they fill like they might be getting sick, STAY HOME! Hopefully I get my vaccine soon! So many things you worry about when you become a mom.

We just sit and wait now...

Belly Cast!

False Alarm

Well I just got a little taste of what's to come! The Other night after work I was experiencing some pretty harsh back pain. I didn't think much of it except for the fact that nothing I could do would relieve the pain. I just thought my 12 hour shift at work really did me in. By 3 o'clock in the the morning and not a wink of sleep, I called in to work for the next day. 11 am I called my mom crying about how bad my back hurt. She suggested I call the doctor because it might be a kidney infection. So we went to the doctor and they hooked me up to their fetal monitor. Surpriseingly enough I was contracting every 2 to 4 min, and that back pain was actually back labor. When they told me that if my cervix was changing they would keep me and we would have our baby, I will admit I got a little nervous. Meanwhile Mike is shadow boxing every item in the room and pretending to shoot things with is fake rifle and sound effects. Unfortunately my cervix was holding study and I was sent home with some Ambien. The Ambien helped me sleep and I have been feeling much better since. If that was a taste of it, I don't want to know how bad the real thing is going to be.

I am now 75% effaced, and 1 cm dialated. Time for a massage and maybe that will kick start something. Knowing my luck I will be overdue and this whole situation had nothing to do with impending real labor. This will drive me nuts! Every twinge or weird feeling makes me think "could this be it"???