Long Time No Write

Just when I thought I would give up on writing a blog because I am too busy or because I thought no one was reading them, Gene comes through and demands  a post with pictures.  I am glad he did because one day I will look back on these and be glad that I did it even though I felt like it was a waste of time ...at the time.

So, where do I start as far as updates go? Well, B is a full on 3 year old with back talking and everything. His favorite thing to say to us when he is mad at us is " I don't like you, you're not coming to my birthday party!" When we would say "Ok, I guess I will return your present and cancel the party", he started to get a little more smart. He changed his tune and starting saying " I don't like you, you're not coming to C's birthday party!" Once the party was over we were looking forward to not hearing that phrase for a long time, but that was short lived. His favorite movie now is The Sandlot, and he will watch it everyday and act out every scene.  He loves playing baseball and is actually really good, better than most 5-6 year olds. He can slam a ball pitched to him, he just recently started catching balls with his glove and his favorite move is sliding into home (or any base for that matter). My favorite words that he says, that still remind me of how young he is, are; bana (banana), hairy dogs (prairie dogs), hosbibal (hospital), almons (almonds), and instead of saying "I" he says "me". For instance "me don't know", and "me want it". Right now B is either the sweetest angel child or he is the devil and it can switch within seconds of each other. He is all about his independence and wanting to help out. For example, he tried to wash my iPad for me in the sink, he wants to cut his own food and dress himself. It is a lot of fun watching B grow up, he is such a funny kid. Oh and he can draw the best robots. His pictures have gone from scribbles to actual things now.

C lee is now crawling all around and making all kinds of new sounds,  He can clap and loves his jumperoo. All around C is a very observant  child and is already showing signs of independence. He already is better playing by himself then B was at this age. The one thing C can't do as well a B at this age is eat solid food. He seems to have a very sensitive gag reflex, so I have a feeling I will be pureeing his food for a long time. His hair is just as out-of-control as ever, but as with B, we are not cutting his hair until his first birthday. C is sleeping well through the night, 8pm- 630 am and I hope that doesn't change although once his first tooth gets ready to cut I am sure it will.

New Beginnings

I have officially switched jobs. I now work in an OB/Gyn office, but I can't say I love it yet. I have been there for 2 weeks and feel like an idiot. For those of you who know me, I hate feeling like an idiot. They do things so differently and it makes me second guess everything that I do. Their paranoia has now become my paranoia. The nice thing about working in an office is that I get all weekends and holidays off, the bad thing is that I can't work a 12 hour shifts which I enjoyed because I got to get four days off a week. I guess its give a little take a little kind of situation.

The boys are getting so big. B is in the terrible two's and is approaching the horrible 3's. He is still not potty trained and at this point I am so tired that I don't even feel like training him. This kid is so hard headed that if anyone suggests to him going in the potty he won't do it. If it is his idea then he will, and he will do both poop and pee. He's know how he just won't. I sort of gave up, but the daycare lady is also frustrated and is dropping hints that it is time and she is sick of changing his diaper.

B will often say he his your "best friend" one minute and then the very next he will tell you that you are mean and that he doesn't like you. He hits, pinches, kicks, and screams at us. We try to discipline him, but he just doesn't care. He could care less if you spank him, put him in time out, take toys away, or yell at him. Some days I want to rip my hair out. Unfortunately we are at the point where there are more bad days than good. I just want my sweet B man back already! Who stole him?

At least I got one kid who likes me or at least my boobs. Yes, I am still nursing, but not for anything more than comfort. C lee just loves the boob. He could sit there for hours with it if I'd let him (ok sometimes I do, especially if B is throwing a temper tantrum and I tell mike I am busy and he has to deal with it). B was just too interested in the world around him to stare at my chest, C is still ok with it. He is rolling all around and now he just starting eating cereal. He is sleeping through the night better now with the cereal and really enjoys it. He get pretty excited when he sees me preparing it. My biggest fear if that we will have constipation issues like we did for B, so far so good.

Life is getting more challenging now with too boys. C needs to be entertained and B is being 3, so it is so tiring. I wouldn't trade it for any thing though. I love them so much.

Mike has really stepped  up his father roll and with me working 4 days a week, he has taken another step deeper into being a stay- at- a- home -dad. He mostly enjoys it and I know the kids love it too. I am glad that at least one parent can be home with them for most of the week.

Adios

Ramblings

So C has an official diagnosis of Sandifer Syndrome cause by gastroesophogeal reflux (GERD). This is something bengin and something he will grow out of. The sensation of the reflux messes with his immature central nervous system causing him to have these "shudders". Weird, I know, but I don't care as long as he is fine! The nuerologist says he looks great and is developing on schedule if not ahead of schedule so praise the Lord for that.

We had our garge sale over the weekend and sold about $180 worth of stuff. I still have a lot of baby clothes that I don't know what to do with. I might save them for when my sister has a baby, no pressure or anything ;-).

B is still not potty trained and Mike is a little worried about it, but I reassured him that there are a lot of boys who aren't potty trained by 3 (hopefully we are not one of them). B is repeating everything we say now and I realize there are a lot of phrases that I say which I didn't realize. Since he communicates as we do I notice him saying "Oh my God/goodness" , "cool", "awsome", "come on", "please and thank you" (this one I like), "hi my baby", "babe", and many others. He is really turning into a little man and its excited yet sad. I miss my baby.
Speaking of, I can't decide if I am done having babies. Mike is done for sure so I guess I have to be. Since I am most likely switching jobs we are thinking he needs to get "the big V" while I am still on Kaiser insurance since it will be cheaper. The thought of making it permanent is so sad. When I see brand new babies it makes me miss it (even though mine is 4 months old). I really thought I was done while I was pregnant, but for some reason I just don't know.

C has followed in B's foot steps yet again and has started developing dread locks. I saw his first one this weekend. My kids have freakishly long and wispy hair that tangles up into dread locks that I have to try and comb out or cut out. We won"t be cutting his hair until his first birthday, so I have a long journey ahead of me.

Seems like both kids have been sick a lot. C has been sick 3 times in his four months of life and B seems to have been sick off and on the entire summer. I really hope this gets better and I am sure they do to. C can't eat very well because he can't breath out of his nose, so he get really fraustrated. Loving being a mom though.

5 Months Old!

I can't believe my baby, my last baby, is 5 months old today. He is such a good baby. He only cries when he needs something and is always observing his world around him. He loves watching his brother and, believe it or not, wrestling. Yes, wrestling. He likes to roll around and run into you. He'll even try to crawl over and on you. I can barely believe it myself. He also gets the concept of Peek-a-boo. He will put his toy or stuff animal over his eyes and then pull it down real fast, then will laugh when you say "peek-a-boo". He is darling. I love him so much and I am already wrapped around his little finger, hence why I still get up with him at 4 am to nurse and let him nurse/snack all day long on me. I love it and he loves it too. The only real milstone he hasn't quit grasp yet is name recongnition, but its not his fault. He has a lot of names. Here they are and I am sure I am missing some; Carter Lee, C-lee, C- lo- green, Cartier, Lee, Lee Lee, Baby Carter, Leo, Leopold, My Baby and as the years go on I am sure there will be more.

B and C's interactions are so adorable. While I hold the baby and tell B what toys to pick up, after every toy he turns and looks at me (and the baby). C just finds this so funny and will do an all out belly laugh after every toy. Of course, B lives for this kind of attention so he is so happy that he can make brother laugh. Also, at the store I will wear C and B wants to sit in the front of the cart while I push it. Since they are face to face now, it is all out giggles the whole shopping trip, and I LOVE IT!!! Their relationship has really made a 180. I will catch B randomly reaching for C's hand in the stroller, B will randomly walk up to C and give him a hug and kiss. He is always asking if C can come with us on our B and mommy day. C is always looking for B and lights up when he sees him. I hope this lasts forever. This is the best part about having two kids. It really melts my heart, like literally melt my heart, I can feel it, I swear.

My Shudder Bug

So of course C Lee found out that B man gave us a scare as a baby when we found that hemangioma on his liver so he decided to give a little scare of his own with shudder attacks.  We didn't know thats what it was because they look very similar to seizures. Two emergency room visits and new underwear later we are convinced that C lee is having benign shudder attacks. What are these that you speak of? Well, sometimes when we start to fall asleep or we are asleep and we jolt ourselves awake once, imagine doing that over and over for a few seconds and you got a shudder. We noticed that when C lee was tired (around his morning nap) we would feed him and as he difted off to sleep he would start shaking (seizure like) for a few seconds and then stop. All the while still eating. It really scared us, especiall since he fell off the couch two days prior. We didn't know if the fall damaged his brain or not ( we were reassured by docotrs that it did not). So basically, he does this as a result of an immature central nervous system and he will eventually grow out of it within the year. To make sure, we still want to consult the neurologist and show him the video Mike was able to capture. If she agrees we will probably not do the EEG and just watch him and make sure it doesn't get worse.

On another note, I am probably going to take on a new job that is closer to home and I will get to do more OB work. I am exicted not to drive down to Denver and am looking for to the change in scenery and new challenges. I will update you on more when I know more.

B man and C lee are getting along so good right now. C lee loves watching B jump around and is always smiling at him. B likes that he can make his brother smile. He is a natural comic.

Once Upon a Potty

So we are in full potty training mode at our house. I am beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have to see the light because I have decided that I just bought my last box of diapers for him come hell or high water. He is actually doing pretty good. We are using the reward system (jelly beans and M&M's) and it seems to be working for now. I assuming this with be a "two steps forward, one step back" process and I ok with that. The other day he told me twice that he need to go pee and he did both times in the big potty! He is getting pretty good and is getting to the point where he doesn't want to wear a diaper. He says "I'm a big boy mommy, no change me". That's fine as long as we are in the house, but he doesn't want to wear one outside or when we go out which is a problem. I finally had to tell him that if he didn't cover up the police was going to put him in jail for indescent exposure. Yes, sometimes I parent with fear... no judging.

He is a lot better with C lee. Now, he trys to comfort him when he cries and the other day I caught him actually trying to play with him. Of course this melted my heart. C lee loves just watching B and will track him with his eyes and then kick around when he gets closer. So cute.

C is the most adorable boy. How did I make such cute kids? He is such a snuggle bug. Every morning when I am not working I bring him into bed with me to nurse and I swear the two of us would stay asleep until 8 am. Too bad Mike has to get up with B man at 6:30 in the morning. Not my fault I have the boobs, I am "nursing" from 630-8. He has laughed for Mike now a few times. I can't seem to get him to go there with me. At least I saw one of his first laughs. He does smile an awful lot. He plays by himself in his crib the mornings I go to work and when Mike walks him to get him he just starts smiling and gets all excited to start the day. For the most part he is sleeping through the night. I nurse him at about 4 am and then we "nurse" from 630 to 8 am. He is also cooing and making this gurgling noise a lot too. Sometimes he gets really loud as if to say "Guys, I am over here. Don't forget about me!".  I just love him so much! I want another one. I went back and read what B man was up to at this same stage and I said the same thing about wanting another one. I think B had better head control at this stage but I am not going to compare. lol.

Brothers!

Big gummy smile!

 I found my feet

So tired!

Back to work already!

I can't believe I am already back to work. So many things in my life has changed, including this web lay out for my blog. It took me awhile to figure out how to post this. Anyways, we all knew this day would come and boy, did it come fast. Everything seems to be on fast forward. I feel like my baby is so big already, expecially when I see all these other brand new ones around (I don't know if you noticed, but everyone and their mom is either pregnant or just had a new baby). Although I am glad to be back at work (sort of a nice break), I just wish it wasn't for 12 hours. Why can't I work three 8 hour shifts but still earn the same salary as before?
Being a mom the second time around is so different then the first. Instead of worrying if my baby is eating, pooping, and peeing enough, I now worry about location. Location of my two year old vs. my baby. I can not leave the two of them alone together. If I shower, B man has to shower with me or else he might try and "care" for the baby. Getting them in and out of the car (who comes first) and who is getting or not getting adequate attention are also new worries. I do feel less anxiety this go 'round which has really helped with my postpartum recovery, but I am a lot more tired. These boys do not sleep at the same time. Which is good and bad. Good because I can give individual attention and focus to one of them, bad because it makes it hard to get stuff done and nap myself.

B man on becoming a big brother- At first he was really excited and interested in C lee and that lasted about 4 days. Then it was like he realized C lee was staying and thats when the "abuse" started. He would bite him (nose, fingers, and toes) and push his head really hard against C lee's head. He would pull arms and legs and act like he was going to do something nice and then last minute hit him. It's been hard but they say this is normal behavior. Now, (3 months later) it is better. He will tell me when he starts crying and tell him "its ok baby". If he cries he will say that he needs a booboo or a paci. When other kids come up the C lee to see him (for instance, at the park) he'll come running over and stand right next to him like he is his protector. That kind of stuff melts my heart.

B man as a 2 1/2 year old- He is talking up a storm (oh I can't say "storm" because he is frightened of thunder and lightening), I'll just say he is a talker. Sometimes he says things and I am like "where did he get that?" or "how does he know that?". Now he asks "why" for everthing. At first it was cute, now it gets a little annoying. He also repeats everything I say, so I have to be very careful. He is do amazing in daycare and has really made a 180. His "teacher" says he is such a pleasure. He always says he had fun, asked when he is going back, and does not cry at drop off or pick up. I think since C lee has been born that has been his personal refuge. Whatever it is, I am just glad he likes going and likes his teacher. He just started potty training and has gone both pee and poop in the potty, although its not consistent, there is light at then end of this diaper tunnel. He is so fun to watch/observe because he really is becoming a little man with his own ideas and imagination. He is so funny too. He dances all the time and loves playing instruments and being a "rock star". One time when I was breastfeeding C lee, he grabed his stuffed animal and put him to his breast, then proceeded to make a painful facial expression and say "ouch ouch ouch, oooohhhh, ouch". It must of been right when C lee was born and it was still painful to nurse. hahaha.

Baby C lee- He has the cutest smile (he started smiling at 5 weeks and is so close to laughing). He loves sucking on his hands and arms. He will root so hard that he almosts flips himself out of his swing. For the most part he is a really good baby. He is calm and really only cries when he needs something (now that we got the whole lactose thing figured out, it was bothering me there for bothering him). He does fight sleep though, but once he is down for the night he has gone 6-9 hours straight! I love his little voice when he coos and of course, his feet. God how I love my babies feet. When he was first born he had quite an old man hair line, now the front part is coming in (looks like I buzzed it). Hey, business in the front, party in the back, hahaha.
Mike and I are also smarter and not so regimentd this time. He go out to eat a lot now (without B man, but with C lee) because we know that C lee won't be sleeping through dinner much longer and our "date nights" will come to an end.
All and all I love being a mom. I love my boys so much. I always said "two and through", but now I don't know. I sort of want another one. Mike on the other hand is D-O-N-E done done done. Maybe he will change his mind. Maybe I will change my mind as C lee gets older and Mike and I start getting our lives back. Who knows. Lets just say the vasectomy is on hold....for now.

C-lee

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Carter Lee's Birth Story

I had been having contractions for weeks now, and by this point (2 days before my due date), I was sure I would have a March baby. Monday started out as usual. I didn't work on Sunday and decided half days were good for me until this baby came. I dropped B man off with his Nana around 1030 am and decided to just go ahead and go to work even though I wasn't expected until 2 pm. I figured since I slept the best I had slept in a long time the night before, no use in hanging around the house when I could go make money. I clocked in at noon and by 3 pm the contractions started up again. They weren't painful but noticeable. I thought I was doing the same thing I did a week before and was having false labor. By 8pm, I was scanning my patient who was also pregnant (1st trimester) that was having pelvic pain. I noticed our expressions and grimaces were the same. By the end of the exam I looked at my co-worker and said " I need to lay down".

I laid in one of our exam rooms for two hours, texting my mom and Mike. Trying to convince myself that this wasn't real. Going back and forth with the decision to call people down to the hospital this late at night. Finally, I made the decision that no matter what they said I wasn't able to drive home and needed either a pain killer or an sleep aide. So I walked down to L&D triage where the same nurse who saw me last week was there again. Now I really felt stupid for not knowing whether this was real or not. She said I was 3.5 cm dilated and could stretch me to 4 cm so that I could stay. I agreed and it really hurt. The contractions after that really started to hurt worse. Convinced this still wasn't it or that I had a long way to go, I told the nurse that I could walk the halls until my family showed up. Now, I said this because I thought I still needed to show progression before they would send me up to L&D. She looked at me and said "are you sure you just don't want your epidural?" I really was confused now and declined. She came back into the room about 8 min later and I said " I would take the epidural if it was still offered". So glad I did because the pain got really intense.

I made it up to my delivery room, the same room B was born in. At this point I am in a lot of pain and wondering where the hell my family was. I am sitting there on the side of the bed prepping for my epidural thinking, where is Mike? He is suppose to help hold me down for my epidural because I don't know if I can stay still for it. And just like that, God heard my cries and I didn't have a single contraction for 15 minutes. They were right on top of each other before. Just as the catheter went into my back my mom showed up and not long after that Mike came in. I joked and said they must of planned waiting to come until after the epidural, but maybe that wasn't a joke??.

Labor after that was pretty uneventful, except for me dropping my blood pressure a couple of times causing me to vomit and the window in my right hip that the epidural did not seem to get. That was a weird feeling because even though I could not feel my hip when I touched it, it was like the pain was deep in my bone coming out. The only time it felt better was when I was pushing and after delivery.

By 5 am my hip pain was horrendous and they checked me at 5:15 and said "time to push". The first push hurt my hip, but after that it felt better and 13 minutes later (not 4 hours this time), my precious, no name little boy was born. He looked nothing like B did (I don't even think he had a cone head) and I knew he weighed less then B too. When they pulled him out before Mike could say what it was, I looked down and thought for a split second I saw swollen labia, but it turned out to be scrotum. I always had a feeling this was going to be a little boy. He looked so perfect and I cried. I couldn't believe he was here already. This pregnancy went so fast (even though it always seems that way when you area pregnant) and I thought, I will never feel like this again and I was sad. The thought of a third baby crossed my mind and I still sometimes think I want another. Mike is for sure a no go on that idea.

I was exhausted after delivery and the last thing I wanted to do was nurse. I even thought that I wouldn't nurse at all this time, but once he was latched, something in me said "oh this feels so right, I do remember how much I enjoyed nursing".

Later that night the birth certificate lady came in to collect and we still had no name. It took us another 24 hours to figure it out. We were going back and forth between Carter, Levi, and Eli. I wanted to call the baby Leelee so I thought Levi would be good. Mike had always liked Carter or Eli. I didn't really like Eli and Mike had vetoed Levi so we went with Carter. Middle name came as a compromise because with Lee as a middle name (Mike's middle name as well) I could still call him Leelee if I wanted.

So there it is. The story of Carter Lee weighing in at 7 lbs 5 ounces and 20 inches long. Born on February 28th 2012, one day early and not a leap day baby. I am so blessed to have such a beautiful family. I feel so lucky to have a healthy baby boy. I am trying to soak up all his "newbornness" because I know how fast it goes.

Tick Tock Tick Tock

This waiting game is killing me. I am trying to just except the fact that I have no control over when this little one arrives, and am trying to enjoy what little time we have left as a family of three. I am just really uncomfortable.

Anyways, I wanted to brag about how many songs B man know now. Its so awsome to hear him sing. His voice is like a cross between Fergie and Jesus (haha). Seriously though, it is so darn cute and sweet. He knows Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Baa Baa Black Sheep, ABC's, Skip to my Lou, and Happy Birthday. He is also able to count to ten. He is so smart that it just amazes me the stuff/stories he tells (when I can translate them). Another funny thing he does is, he'll ask about something, for instance, an airplane. We'll say, "Yes, B that is an airplane and it flies high in the sky". Then he'll say to the other parent the same thing one of us just told him, like it was his orginal thought. Its funny because both of us are sitting right there. Its almost like he is playing the game telephone. When he gets really excited to tell us something he always goes into this frantic state. For example, he'll say "mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mom the sky blue". He says our name like one hundred times before he can spit out his thought. And if you ever had to watch your mouth before, its ten fold now. He has repeated damn and a few other words now. Yikes.

One of my favorite things he says and does is "hold hand" and then he grabs my hand. It pretty much melts my heart although I a pretty sure he does it when he knows I am about to leave him so that I feel extra guilty. I am sure going to miss these precious moments. Never knew one could love someone so deeply.

I hope I don't rush by these moments with him or the new baby for that matter.

Oh and before I forget, at my 38 week appointment I am a tight 3 cm dilated and still 50% effaced, my fundal height is 36cm and I gained 3 pounds. That is a total of 17 pounds this pregnancy. At this point I would be surprised if this baby weighs more than B did. But I'm still not done cooking it yet so we'll see.

Ding the fries are done!

I mean I am done! But I am not, but I am, but not right now, but may in a little bit. That is how confused I am. One part of me wants this baby out because I am so tired and just done. Another part of me is trying to enjoy this time because I won't be doing this again (at least we are 90% sure of that) plus, now I know how much more tired I will be when the baby gets here. Why isn't there something out there that allows us to not be pregnant for the last two weeks, our baby is put into an artificial womb, then us parents get to go on a good relaxing vacation, and when we come home he take the baby out and enjoy?!?! I would be the richest woman in the world if I could invent that, (oh and it would be covered by insurance). I think our population would triple if that came true.

So, I go back to the doctor on wednesday and maybe some more progress will be made. I am hoping for 3 cm dilated and 90% effaced, then deliver on the 19th just like B. Oh the wishful thinking.

Everything right now is "oh, could this be it?" AND IT IS DRIVING ME NUTS!

36 week appointment

2 cm dilated and 50% effaced. These contractions that I have been feeling are doing something. Oh and baby has dropped too.

One more post for this month

I want first start off by saying B has some new phrases he likes to say now:

1. "Night dude".
2. " No..right now".
3. "Give it to me".
4. "Mama, come right back?"
He can count to 10 and say the Abc's (obviously some stuff is skipped over like 5 6 7 and l m n o p sounds like " yellow yellow P".)
5. "sun sleep moon out " and vice versa
6. He always wants "cereal and jews " for breakfast (thats juice in case you don't translate to well)
7. He thinks its so funny to put a "U" at the end of names. For example "mamu, papu, nanu, babu"
8. He loves when Mike or I come home. His favorite thing to do is surprise you. He'll hide and then jump out and say "prize mama" or "Mommy home".

Now that he sleeps in his big boy bed and refuses to let up put the gate up in his door way (its now at the stairs) he comes right into our room and up to me. I work up to him once caressing my face (I do this to him to get him to sleep) and also breathing on me. I thought it was Mike's breath for awhile til I opened my eyes and he was starring at me smiling. I couldn't resist laughing, and now my baby has normal big boy stinky morning breath.

I had my maternity photo session done a couple of days ago and they turned out really well. Thank God my sister is good at what she does because I feel and look like I haven't slept in a year. We really wanted to do something very different this time around and I like we accomplished it. I am excited to post some pictures here soon. We even went outside and although I froze my tail off, I trusted my sister's vision and am so glad I did because with some editing they look great!

She also mentioned that she may be seeing me in a couple of weeks for newborn pictures and I just about fell over. I mean technically I could. Lots of women have their babies 2-3 weeks early. This made me realized that I need to really try and enjoy these last few week, as hard as it may be, since I most likely won't be experiencing this again.

I looked back at my pregnancy blog with B and it appears I am par for the coarse. When it comes to contractions, size, weight, sleep deprivation, cravings and so on... I am right on target as before.

Now the mind game begins. Tick tock tick tock.

35/35

I am almost 35 weeks along and therefor 35 days to go. We are trying to get things ready to go for this one's arrival, but are not feeling motivated. I don't know what it is, but with B I am sure we were done with everything by this time and were just waiting on his arrival. I am starting to feel really uncomfortable and worn out. I am trying to play and do a lot of things with B because I know that once this baby comes that time will have to be split between the two. That alone is wearing me out. I have such bad "MOM GUILT" its not even funny. I feel so guilty for having another baby and then I feel guilty for feeling guilty. I don't want to deprive either child.

Also, the stress at work is getting to me. I just found out that I will not be paying for full- time benefits this year because my department does not want to grant me 2 more hours a week to qualify for their new full time status. This means that I will be paying more monthly for insurance and not receive as much paid time off and other perks that come with full time status. This is caused me to look else where for work, which is hard to do when I am this far along. I've decided that while I am out on maternity leave I will try and find another job that can provide us the full time benefits. This could be a blessing in disguise as I might find something out there that is better and needed this push to get me out of my comfort zone. It may not. Either way I just the Lord has a plan for me.

B has been really clinging lately. At one end its nice to have that "I'm needed feeling" and at the other end, it only makes my "mom guilt" worse. Oh well, I guess there is nothing I can do about it, but just try and be the best mom I can be.

Happy New Year 2012!

Like always, I can't believe how fast 2011 flew by. When I got pregnant this time I told myself I wouldn't worry about anything for the baby til after the holidays, and then I will really buckle down. Well, now that they are over, I have this strong feeling of urgency and anxiety (are you surprised because I am not). I am 8 months (32 weeks) pregnant and just now starting my to-do list. The only problem is, whenever I feel like I have so much to do and overwhelmed, my natural instinct is to just shut down, close my eyes and pretend its not there. I don't even know where to start. So I decided to break it down and start with the nursery...oh oops, B is still in the nursery. Ok, not a problem lets go buy him furniture and set up his new big boy room. Check! Now what? Nursing stuff. Bottles, pump equipment organization, nipples and bottle cleaners... check! One by one this will be my life for the next couple of months until this baby comes, all while working full time and taking care of a 2 year old. Whoa is me. lol

Speaking of B's new room, we've had two full nights in it now and so far, not so bad. The first night required me to lay in bed with him until he fell asleep, and the second now required Mike (I was working the next morning) to get up with him a couple times. He did, however, fall asleep on his own though. I guess we can't expect to get everything we want right away. I will say I am SO glad I got a video monitor. I can see if he is staying in bed or getting into trouble and it is nice, I don't care what other people say.

For new baby we did something we never did while I was pregnant with B. I got a 3d ultrasound and video. Now, I would never pay for something like this, but since it was free it was fun to do. Baby was laying with its hand under its cheek and cuddling its foot. Super cute. Excited to meet this little person. Names are still not set in stone but we have some options narrowed down. Now for Dr.s appointment to see what damage I did to my weight with holiday food. Oh well, I don't care. I have an excuse and the Dr. won't care either. More or less curious. If I didn't gain a whole lot its because B and I have been dancing our a$$ off. Thats his new favorite thing to do, to just dance and I love dancing with him.