One more post for this month

I want first start off by saying B has some new phrases he likes to say now:

1. "Night dude".
2. " No..right now".
3. "Give it to me".
4. "Mama, come right back?"
He can count to 10 and say the Abc's (obviously some stuff is skipped over like 5 6 7 and l m n o p sounds like " yellow yellow P".)
5. "sun sleep moon out " and vice versa
6. He always wants "cereal and jews " for breakfast (thats juice in case you don't translate to well)
7. He thinks its so funny to put a "U" at the end of names. For example "mamu, papu, nanu, babu"
8. He loves when Mike or I come home. His favorite thing to do is surprise you. He'll hide and then jump out and say "prize mama" or "Mommy home".

Now that he sleeps in his big boy bed and refuses to let up put the gate up in his door way (its now at the stairs) he comes right into our room and up to me. I work up to him once caressing my face (I do this to him to get him to sleep) and also breathing on me. I thought it was Mike's breath for awhile til I opened my eyes and he was starring at me smiling. I couldn't resist laughing, and now my baby has normal big boy stinky morning breath.

I had my maternity photo session done a couple of days ago and they turned out really well. Thank God my sister is good at what she does because I feel and look like I haven't slept in a year. We really wanted to do something very different this time around and I like we accomplished it. I am excited to post some pictures here soon. We even went outside and although I froze my tail off, I trusted my sister's vision and am so glad I did because with some editing they look great!

She also mentioned that she may be seeing me in a couple of weeks for newborn pictures and I just about fell over. I mean technically I could. Lots of women have their babies 2-3 weeks early. This made me realized that I need to really try and enjoy these last few week, as hard as it may be, since I most likely won't be experiencing this again.

I looked back at my pregnancy blog with B and it appears I am par for the coarse. When it comes to contractions, size, weight, sleep deprivation, cravings and so on... I am right on target as before.

Now the mind game begins. Tick tock tick tock.

35/35

I am almost 35 weeks along and therefor 35 days to go. We are trying to get things ready to go for this one's arrival, but are not feeling motivated. I don't know what it is, but with B I am sure we were done with everything by this time and were just waiting on his arrival. I am starting to feel really uncomfortable and worn out. I am trying to play and do a lot of things with B because I know that once this baby comes that time will have to be split between the two. That alone is wearing me out. I have such bad "MOM GUILT" its not even funny. I feel so guilty for having another baby and then I feel guilty for feeling guilty. I don't want to deprive either child.

Also, the stress at work is getting to me. I just found out that I will not be paying for full- time benefits this year because my department does not want to grant me 2 more hours a week to qualify for their new full time status. This means that I will be paying more monthly for insurance and not receive as much paid time off and other perks that come with full time status. This is caused me to look else where for work, which is hard to do when I am this far along. I've decided that while I am out on maternity leave I will try and find another job that can provide us the full time benefits. This could be a blessing in disguise as I might find something out there that is better and needed this push to get me out of my comfort zone. It may not. Either way I just the Lord has a plan for me.

B has been really clinging lately. At one end its nice to have that "I'm needed feeling" and at the other end, it only makes my "mom guilt" worse. Oh well, I guess there is nothing I can do about it, but just try and be the best mom I can be.

Happy New Year 2012!

Like always, I can't believe how fast 2011 flew by. When I got pregnant this time I told myself I wouldn't worry about anything for the baby til after the holidays, and then I will really buckle down. Well, now that they are over, I have this strong feeling of urgency and anxiety (are you surprised because I am not). I am 8 months (32 weeks) pregnant and just now starting my to-do list. The only problem is, whenever I feel like I have so much to do and overwhelmed, my natural instinct is to just shut down, close my eyes and pretend its not there. I don't even know where to start. So I decided to break it down and start with the nursery...oh oops, B is still in the nursery. Ok, not a problem lets go buy him furniture and set up his new big boy room. Check! Now what? Nursing stuff. Bottles, pump equipment organization, nipples and bottle cleaners... check! One by one this will be my life for the next couple of months until this baby comes, all while working full time and taking care of a 2 year old. Whoa is me. lol

Speaking of B's new room, we've had two full nights in it now and so far, not so bad. The first night required me to lay in bed with him until he fell asleep, and the second now required Mike (I was working the next morning) to get up with him a couple times. He did, however, fall asleep on his own though. I guess we can't expect to get everything we want right away. I will say I am SO glad I got a video monitor. I can see if he is staying in bed or getting into trouble and it is nice, I don't care what other people say.

For new baby we did something we never did while I was pregnant with B. I got a 3d ultrasound and video. Now, I would never pay for something like this, but since it was free it was fun to do. Baby was laying with its hand under its cheek and cuddling its foot. Super cute. Excited to meet this little person. Names are still not set in stone but we have some options narrowed down. Now for Dr.s appointment to see what damage I did to my weight with holiday food. Oh well, I don't care. I have an excuse and the Dr. won't care either. More or less curious. If I didn't gain a whole lot its because B and I have been dancing our a$$ off. Thats his new favorite thing to do, to just dance and I love dancing with him.